Gender, Gender, Gender

 

“Once they stood with broken hearts,

‘women of war, of sickness, of scars,

women who stayed when the night turned cold, 

who bore their cross with a quiet brave soul.

They were the single mothers made by fate,

not by haste, nor by self-fed hate.

 

But now… omo, how the world has evolved, where love is rushed, and marriages are crushed. 

Where wombs are bargained to trap a man,

and marriage vows are made with a lustful mind.

You rush in and rush out and call it, ‘lonely pride’,

yet hide the tears they cry inside.

 

So many now wear motherhood

not as a badge of trials withstood , but as a shield from their own past,

a tale rewritten much too fast. 

They flee from patience, from growing pain,

from mending hearts through storms and rain.

 

Some flirted with men who meant no vow,

yet bore their child, and wonder how the world should cheer and lift their name, 

while shirking guilt and shifting blame. 

“Independent, strong woman” they loudly cry,

yet in their silence are mournful sighs.”

 

This poem brought me once again to look into the womanhood and motherhood of today, and in contrast to this is the movie, straw, where a single mother does everything within and outside her reach for her child’s survival. Not for once did she do any of the things she did to prove anything to anyone (any man actually).

Growing up, I can say 80% of my live was guided by females/mothers who could survive with/without their husbands… not to prove anything to their husbands, but it was just due to how right they had set their priorities from their youth days till now. 

Women/ladies jump into motherhood to prove to men that the world could go on with or without them (men) which is a very wrong mindset to live with because in my opinion, I feel the moment we start playing our parts as humans and not as “men” or “women” or “just a girl”, maybe, just maybe, would the world begin to be better for us all. 

What do I mean by this, right? 

This is the picture here:

It has always been in the system for men to be above women, it is not a self acclaimed title, remember. Women were built to be in men’s life as a SUPPORT and not a LIABILITY, remember. 

Now, a situation where a man cannot meet up with expectations due to one reason or the other does it give a woman the right to down talk him. Once a man noticed you are there for the money alone, especially when you’ve have nothing to offer, his mentality begins to change. He begins to see you as a commodity, an object he could “just” keep with a relationship and even a child.

I do not stand to be corrected on this; the moment you as a lady seize to monetize your presence or availability to a man, you also wouldn’t be sexualized, most especially when these men know you’re just up for material things, expect nothing else but whatever you end up getting from them. You do not down talk a man and sit there waiting for princess treatment (it’s queen treatment I want sha), you’re a big joke if you do that.

I have mentioned this a good number of times in my articles: women are at the receiving end of whatever the outcome of gender war is. A man’s life is way easier to continue than a woman’s. It either stops there or you get really slowed down, you’re so tired to pick yourself up, talk more of a child. 

Like I said earlier, the moment we start taking actions as humans and not based on gender, maybe, just maybe, the world could get a bit better.